Rosie1986             
 


May 19 2008, 5:24 pm / Disappointed

Today i cut myself i know this is bad but i needed to as last night my whole family went out to someones celebration of life and we had to climb 32 stairs to get to the room i was not to bad but when i got there i started to have a panic attack so before it got to bad i went down the stairs and stayed ouside to get some water and to try and calm down. In the end my dad had to take me home and stayed at home with me. I feel like ive let down my family as last night wasnt about me but about someones life, why cant i just be normal for once, without fearing about everything. I knew i had to climb 32 steps but i thought i could do it, you see i have to look and check out every place before i go. I also feel like i mess up everyones life by saying the wrong thing and i make them hate me, im meant to phone my therapist but i cant. 

My Comments

May 20 2008, 6:23 pm
Hey im glad you understand what i went through the other day. It doesnt matter about your age i take advice from anyone. I know what you mean but i dont have anything to hold on to. I hope i get better to sooner rather then later. Thanks for your comment it means alot to me.

rosie1986


From: Mack
May 19 2008, 6:47 pm
Hello Rosie. I'm awfully sorry to hear this, and it's a shame that any human being should ever feel this way at all. I know it hurts, moreso than words can describe, and thus people who have never experienced these things haven't a clue the pain that people like you go through. But you cannot dwell on these things, no matter how much you may want to. You see Rosie, I may be young, possibly one of the youngest on this site, but I know from a great friend and teacher, that you must stand tall, that you must take something that you truly believe in, whether it be your dreams, those you care about, or something else, and you must fight for them. You must believe in them, cherish them, love them, and eventually they will give you the strength to become a better you. Unfortunately this is different for everyone, and I myself am still fighting my problems, but you know, if you have something to hold on to, something to believe in, it will mean so much to you later on down the road. Hope this rather deep reply helped you, and I hope you get better.

Mack