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Apr 18 2008, 3:51 am / Don\'t know

i just joined this group and actually had my first online chat ever the other day and it made me feel good. then i happened to mention it to my mother as soon that i joined a online social anxiety group she just rolled her eyes and gave me this look like i was a freak. shouldn't surprise me she thinks i'm an embarrassment any way both my parents do. the f@ck up thing is they don't even know me. i pretty much dropped them when is was 19 saw them once or twice a year. hell i was suicidal or numb all thru college they didn't even care. they told me to get over it then proceeded to make me feel even more worthless it almost like they want to punish me for there worthless lives. the even lie to my sibling to make me look bad. they even try to lie to me about things they done to me things i saw. they like to use my condition against me. i done a lot of great things in my life but they don't want to hear about that. they rather throw my failures in my face. well at least i try and if they gave a damn they would realize i succeeded more than they would have in my position. hell ive succeeded more than they have any way. why do i still feel like i need her approval.

My Comments

From: tutik
Aug 27 2008, 9:13 am Hai mirror to me you are not failure you still the best people .I see how u help me the other day i very happy even until now i still think that u very-very best so u have nothing to worry.U still have us who always respect and care about u.Is true we all have different problem but we always never give up to face it.We have to be strong so that nobody will look down on us.Same to you also.So remember to be confident to yourself.I did miss u very much and i very happy everytime i chat with u online but we have different time and i always try to chat up with u.So mirror remember u have very special ability that not everyone have it.show to them that u can do anything and don't let them to look down on you OK?AND WE ALWAYS SUPPORT U.TAKECARE.

From: Goldfish
Apr 18 2008, 9:40 am When I read this, my heart went out to you. The most important thing is that you realise yourself that you're a capable and good person no matter what your parents think - good for you! One of life's ironies is craving our parents' approval no matter what their relationship is to us. It's blood, mate and you can't do anything about blood. And I sympathise: I can't even tell you what my parents would do if they knew I visited this site. I hope this helps - I know I speak for everyone here when I say WELCOME and you're a FABULOUS person... I just know it!!!

From: p1lky
Apr 18 2008, 8:19 am My MOther never abussed me but through all my childhood there was never a well done it was allways push on to the next level the goal posts allways moved so i never achieved hence i grew with a very poor low self esteem which aged 46 i am only just starting to turn around with the aid of CBT therapy, We learn to survive and ways of coping as a child and sometimes these stick instead of altering as we get older and wiser

From: TheLifeOfJade
Apr 18 2008, 8:14 am I dont understand when parents do that...it seems like there is always 1 child that gets the sh*t end of the sick...Are you oldest? I used to get in trouble for everything that my brother now does right in front of my mom except i never was doing them. I have no relationship w/ my father and only can have a good relationship w/ my mom and stepdad when i'm not living under their roof. I'm sorry that your family is worthless in your rehabilitation and at the end of the day you have to do what is right for you...joining this site can't hurt and maybe after some time here you can tell your parents the good things it has done. Maybe they are stuck in the past where they see that the internet is just some big joke. ((hugs)) I'm glad that you joined. I think its a wonderful step towards learning about yourself and others like you. :):) Smile! its friday...

From: prism
Apr 18 2008, 4:22 am I was more successful than my brothers and all i got from my parents was indifference to what i did. I was earning more and doing an extremely responsible job. I no longer seek their approval as i will not get it. I live my life the way i wish (what bit of what is called "life" that i have).