Anxiety
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Sep 09 2008, 7:36 pm / Fearful
I worry about everything all the time. When one thing doesn't worry me anymore it is quickly replaced with another worry. I worry about small insignificant things. I worry about anything and everything. Im sick of worrying myself sick if that makes any sense. I worry and obsess about everything. I want peace of mind. I am my own worst enemy. Sometimes I even convince myself that something has happened or is a different way that really is. I know better, but it's like I am at battle with my thoughts 24/7. Do you know what that feels like..... To never have peace of mind...... Sure, I have good days, just like everyone else... Assuming no one is worst off than myself, which is completely biased on my part. I have day's where I dont have a care in the world. I wake up in the morning, and I know there is something I need to worry about, and sometimes it doesn't quite hit me right away...... but shorty after I remember. I worry about worrying. When I worry to the point where it makes me ill...I can't eat, listen to my favorite music, my sons voice makes me cringe. I become an enemy, not only to those around me, but certainly to myself. Worrying is controlling my life. If you were to know me in person, you would have no idea how I suffer inside. I keep it inside me, and I try healing myself. Some days, I don't enjoy anything. I can't watch television, small tasks become astronomic for me to complete. I try and hide the way I am feeling from those around me, but I think deep down they see my pain... I am suffering so much inside. Im crying out for help, but no one can hear me. Don't get me wrong, I am not always sad and worrying myself to death. I enjoy many things in life, but life would be amazing if I could overcome this illness I am presently occupying........
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