By: wknmccla90
Mood: Don't know
Date: Jan 25, 2014
Music: None

I've never wrote a blog not sure wat to say... It's 4:06 am and yet another sleepless night for me up all night in a constant panic and just afraid of everything... I'm so young.. all my friends my age are out living but me I'm in the house setting up letting this rule my life... My anxiety and depression is at it's worst right now and I'm unsure how to attack it or even wen and wat I should do... I'm debating asking for a therapist but I am to ashamed to ask my doctor for a referral to one.. Smh I just want to feel normal... I feel like I'm caged up in this sickness.. I call it a sickness because honestly it's eat it feels like. A sickness that seems to have no cure or way of fixing.... I just want to be normal


From: Pe19
Jan 25 2014, 5:22 am
Hello, I cant really relate to you about the sleepless nights as I never have a problem with that. But I can relate with feeling the anxiety is ruling your life. How do you mean your friends are out there living? If you talking about drinking and clubbing then thats not living, thats running away, I have completely packed in drinking, I used to try fit in with people but I just want to be myself and it makes me feel happy and so I stopped drinking as I could feel the need for alcohol all the time to cure my depression. But anyway, I think you should go visit your doctor, its scary at first but once you've made that first step you are well on your way to becoming better. I kept my problems all bottled up for years, I then told my mum and dad and my mum couldnt understand what or why i had all these problems. My dad however came with me as support to the doctor, who straight away tried putting me on drugs. I went in there knowing what I wanted - therapy. So if you go, which would be good for you as it gets easier afterwards, then tell them what you want, dont let them pressure you into medication, it dont always work.

I hope im helping, i know from experience that was the best choice i ever made, once you are on that waiting list, it gets easier, i promise. And making that first move will be the best thing you'll do because from then on you got to look forward and keep moving up that ladder not back down :)

And what is normal? Everyones unique :) no ones "normal" because everyone is different and some have a few problems that others dont, but you are still a good person. Society nowadays wants everyone to be the same and follow the crowd, if thats what people define normal to be then we are all sheep. But i like to believe each and every one of us are unique and thats something i cherish, be yourself :)