Anxiety Self Help

DATE: May 31 2012, 2:18 pm / MOOD: Other

Music Of The Land

By Tim Fairley

Verse

Burning in sensation,

I can change a nation,

Catch your imagination,

Make it your relation,

Verse

Take advantage of your mind,

Be yourself I'm not blind,

Take a look all around,

Feel the rhythm and the sound,

Chorus

Finding peace within my soul,

Soothing words to make me whole,

Live my life the best I can,

This is the music of the land,

Verse

Take a break, inhale the air,

Feel the wind against your hair,

Feel the moment of your pride,

Live it up and enjoy the ride,

Verse

Grab your gear, jump on stage,

Open up with Turn The Page,

Give the people what they need,

A little rhythm then the lead,

Chorus

Finding peace within my soul,

Soothing words to make me whole,

Live my life the best I can,

This is the music of the land,

Verse

Take a moment, hear the cheers,

Feel the emotion, not the fears,

Close your eyes, rejoice the day,

Lose yourself, it’s time to play,

Verse

Move your body, bang your head,

Watch your fingers start to shred,

Feel the chill come down your spine,

This is your time to shine

Chorus

Finding peace within my soul,

Soothing words to make me whole,

Live my life the best I can,

This is the music of the land

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DATE: May 31 2012, 2:17 pm / MOOD: Other

Love You The Way I do.

By Tim Fairley

Verse 1

The very first moment I locked eyes on you,

I knew there was something that could be true,

From every word that sang from your lips,

My soul would soar and my heart skips,

Verse 2

You make me feel like an eagle in the sky,

Straight to your heart is where I want to fly,

The warmth of your skin keeps me alive,

I found my heart baby and you're my revive,

Chorus

I've got this feeling deep inside my heart,

And I know I never wanna be apart,

My bodys aching for the touch of you,

And baby, no one could love you the way I do

Verse 3

I look at you and see the moon in your eyes,

When you smile you make the sun rise,

I'll be with you until the end of time,

You're the only one I want to be mine,

Verse 4

So darling listen to these words I sing,

Love and happiness you always bring,

Cause I'll be with you every day,

And in this moment, these words I'll say,

Chorus

I've got this feeling deep inside my heart,

And I know I never wanna be apart,

My bodys aching for the touch of you,

And baby, no one could love you the way I do

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DATE: Apr 27 2012, 11:05 pm / MOOD: Mellow

I'm not much of a blogger mainly because when I have a point, it takes me about 10 minutes to get to it. I've already started out off topic of the original point of this blog, so I'll cut to the chase.

 

Decisions. I'm not talking about life changing decisions here. So if you're reading this for some sort of spiritual guidance, you'll most certainly be disappointed. But I don't like to disappoint people, so if you need spiritual guidance, just know that where ever you're living, someone probably died in your vicinity. So you've probably got ghosts floating around right now reading over your shoulder. Spooky eh? Sleep well.

 

 

So I've found myself annoyed. I can't make my mind up. I'm poor and budgets suck. I'm using a ghetto laptop right now. There's a crack in the screen, a missing caplock key and a broken dvd drive. It crashes and overheats all the time and worst of all, it's a Dell. Needless to say, I need a new one. And I've found a new one. A nice Asus. I went and looked at it and liked it. It would suit me perfectly.

 

The other item is a sexy red acoustic Yamaha guitar. Now strictly talking to the guys. Imagine your lady in some sexy lingerie. That's what this guitar is like to me.

 

So from a guys perspective this is like deciding between the sexy car, or the sexy woman whose giving the car a wash in a bikini. You need the car but you REALLY want that woman.

 

A girls perspective... Well all kitchen jokes aside, I'm going to avoid castration and move on from that.

 

I can't have both... Yet. It's basically down to the point of should I get the guitar and wait til I can afford another laptop and who knows, one better may come along or buy the laptop and possibly miss out on the opportunity of picking up that guitar?

 

First world problems.

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DATE: Apr 19 2012, 8:17 pm / MOOD: Don't know

I try to take every precaution to avoid anxiety attacks, but sometimes something just seems to push that trigger.

I was on the bus today going Downtown. As much as I despise going to that wretched part of the city enough, I was fine with it. No one bothered me. I was cool. I did what I needed to do, went into a music store, played some of the guitars and I was having an enjoyable time for a little while. Time to go home, I hop on the first bus and get to the next stop. I get off the the bus and wait for the one to get home. That bus comes and it's packed to the core. I was the only one who decided I wasn't going to jump on it. I like breathing room, and hate people. I passed on it and caught the next one. Of course my bus happens to be the one I have to share with the 5 loud mouthed teenagers. I didn't have my ipod, so I hate to distract myself with thoughts on duct taping their mouths shut and tossing them into a pit where I toss lotion down to them. Buffalo Bill type stuff. It's normal, I hope?

It seemed everyone on the bus were loud except Kid Rock who sat beside me. Not the real Kid Rock, but he looked like him. He was pretty badass. Didn't say a word. He was good company. I think the bus ride would have been more enjoyable if he randomly got up and started singing Bawitdaba and headbanging to it.

What is with teens and wanting to hear their own voices or think everyone else wants to hear them? Sorry but I don't think your ideas are funny. I don't think you're funny at all. I don't think the rest of the bus cares that you managed to fit 5 people on 3 seats.

They should start fining people for talking too loud or too much. I'd be a rich man if I could do that.

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DATE: Apr 18 2012, 2:19 am / MOOD: Fearful

I'm broken, damaged, restented, rejected. I'm alone, neglected, a burden. I'm poison to anyone who gets close and I'm cancer when I get closer. I set myself up for the drop. The closer I get, the harder I fall. The deeper I am, it all crumbles. Do I learn my lesson? It wouldn't seem so. I'm given a glimmer of hope and watch it fade away. I'm a broken mirror as I can't seem to be repaired but only replaced. I must learn to protect and stay away. I'm a battle within myself. I get past a barrier only to find myself pushed back by a force field. I retreat to my own trench. It's where I'm safe. I guard myself. But for how long can I last? As of now, I give up. I'm hopeless, useless, used and abused. I really feel there's nothing for me. Everything that comes into contact with me changes. Not for the better. What am I doing so wrong? I've an understand of every part of myself, except this. I'll never figure it out, so I need to hide. Keep away. Stay away. Bury myself within the walls of self absorbance. I'm rambling. I make no sense. I'm lost and confused. I can't bother. I'm done. I close my eyes and dream of a wonderland. Back to reality, it's an emotional warzone. Forget me.

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